Control your Corgis, Ma'am!

Builders being interviewed at Buckingham Palace are 'terrified' of the Queen's Corgis.

Talks between the local builders and Buckingham palace regarding next year's renovations have gone into 'shut down' as the builders declare the queen's home 'unsafe'.

Pete Wailer, architect and Builder who built Wembley stadium, has reportedly 'refused' to enter the palace unless the Corgis are kept in kennels, 'when I walked in, three of them came galloping towards me. Not like a normal Corgi- those sort just waddle- this lot were on something! They knocked me down and wouldn't stop licking my face!' 

The queen refused to comment, although there are rumours that the builders will no longer have biscuits with their tea.

Meanwhile, the royal correspondent at the BBC was 'not surprised' by these reports. 'The queen loves her babies. They have a cup of tea in the morning- and often out of Philip's cup! They've been brought up thinking everyone wants a cuddle.'

The Buckingham Palace butler speaks less favourably of her majesty's Corgis, 'it's a disgrace!  Last month, one of them wanted to play hide and seek with my shoe. I told her off but then she ran away to the drawing room. I found her with just the shoe laces in her mouth. She'd eaten my shoe! I wear steel toe capped boots, now. I'd like to see her chew one of those!'