Cases of 'giddiness' and 'euphoria' seen in millions of parents as August comes to a close.

Across the UK, the Richter scale has reported regular tremors this week as millions of parents are 'jumping', 'skipping' and 'performing little dances' as the school holidays draws to a close.

A mum from Essex reports that her blood pressure has decreased, bit by bit, since the 20th August, 'we're at the point where I know I haven't got long to go! I can imagine a crumb free lounge and a hot cup of tea!'

Although for some parents it can be a very traumatic time.

TUMS (Traumatised & Upset Mothers) see an increase in online registrations each year: 'mums who watch their child go through the school gate for the very first time have it tough: they have to find out what phonics are, some go into panic mode thinking they can't remember the alphabet! Others hate the fact that they can now go shopping in peace and quiet. It's a traumatising time!'

Meanwhile, the W.I has made a public statement in response to tremors caused by overexcited parents: 'Mothers, get a grip! All this dancing is bad for your crockery; and TUMS Mums, for heavens sake, just learn how to bake!'

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