Tuesday 2 May 2017

Gullible woman does cartwheels to make herself look young.

A woman is suffering from a double fracture to both wrists after she tried to do a triple cartwheel in her local park, today.

Kathryn Player (a mother who displays certain 'wally traits') has done extensive research into the benefits of cartwheeling in an attempt to make herself look more youthful. However, according to her mother it hasn't worked, 'it's a damn shame! She still looks her age.'

It was a post on Mumsnet that recommended this 'deluded' woman to perform three cartwheels a day. Kathryn spoke exclusively to The Big Pickle News, 'I hadn't done a cartwheel since 1989. I thought it would be like riding a bike.'

However, onlookers who witnessed the cartwheels have been 'traumatised' by what they saw. One elderly gentlemen told us, 'it was monstrous- legs were flying everywhere! And I think it's a disgrace to all those professional cart wheelers.'

The association of respectful cartwheelers (ARC) has made a statement: 'no one should perform a cartwheel unless they have our expressed permission to do so.'

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