'What do you do all day?' says imbecile husband who does not value his life!

A man has committed the 'ultimate dad-sin': he asked his stay-at-home wife the most hated question- 'so what EXACTLY do you do all day?'

Mark Ter-watz claims that he was then 'verbally attacked' for over an hour. 'She recited a list and didn't pause for breath. I think she might have burst my ear drum!'

The Society of the Prevention of Twatty Sayings (SPOTS) 'insists' that Mark Ter-watz got his 'just desserts!' A spokesmen spoke exclusively to The Big Pickle News: 'when your partner says something like what have you done all day? they clearly have no more than three brain cells. Therefore, one has to beat them down in order for them to comprehend the enormous list required to run a home and to keep everyone alive!'

Mark Ter-watz and his wife have been 'reconciled'- he bought her some Prosecco.

'TO BE HONEST...' says person who just wants to insult you.

Those friends who say 'to be honest' could 'be about to insult you,' says insult specialist, Ben Johnson, who states that the words 'to be honest' mean 'they are putting a cushion in front of your face before they take the first punch.'

Many agree with this bold statement: 'being honest is the new excuse for saying what you darn well think' says expert in diplomacy, Mr Voice, whose inspirational theory drew the crowds to his lecture on 'Golden Gossip and how to get it.'

Plus, not everyone reacts well to words of honesty. Sally Gulliball wants to sue her husband for his honesty which, he says, was 'well intentioned'.

 Sally spoke exclusively to The Big Pickle News: 'we went shopping and I kept asking does my bum look big in this? He must have replied 'to be honest' about ten thousand times AND THEN he said, 'yeah! Really big!'

Sally Gulliball later reported that she was 'devastated' and that such honesty was 'unacceptable'.
'Why can't a man just lie and have done with it?'

Not noticing a new hair cut is the main reason why your wife wants to punch you, a new study has revealed.

According to a study at Nottingham University, 10,000 men across the country, every ten minutes, are each wondering what they said to put their wife 'in a strop'. A relationship expert from Nottingham University, Mr Big, believes that a women's haircut acts as 'her peacock feathers.' So, he states, 'if she changes her feathers she wants her mate to notice her new feathers.'

Indeed, David Lame from London discovered the 'consequences' of not admiring his wife's new haircut, 'in the middle of the night, my wife dyed my hair orange.' 

It has been reported that Mrs Lame woke her husband up and 'shoved a mirror in his face.'  Mr Lame also said, 'she left me looking like an orange lolly pop. I almost lost my job at the Funeral Directors!'

Meanwhile, W.H.A.T (Women's Hair and Tresses) is not 'surprised' by this woman's reaction to her husband's lack of interest in her hair: 'do you know how much highlights cost, these days? Her husband could have said the the new colour matched her eyes!'

When we went back to Mr Lame, he was busy at Boots looking closely at 'Just For Men' hair dye and had no further comment to make.