Sunday 1 January 2017

Precious celebrities are released from their Bubble Wrap.

Basil Fawlty, Mr Bean and Del Boy are amongst some of the celebrities who've been released from their protective Bubble Wrap now that 2016 is over.

The BBC came up with the protection 'initiative' because they were concerned with the number of celebrities leaving our screens. A spokesmen for the BBC stated, 'it's been frightening. We want to take good care of the ones we have left.'

Doctor Wo-Little who's been leading the protection programme spoke exclusively to The Big Pickle News, 'we've taken good care of our vulnerable celebrities.  They've been fed, watered and placed in a pot under a 24 hour UV light.'

However, it's been reported that Basil was 'deeply disappointed' that the protection programme didn't last longer. 'A week is not enough!' he stated. 'It's my wife, Sybil, who I'm worried about. She won't be happy I'm back and you KNOW what she'll do. She's only just sewn them back on!'

Meanwhile, Dot Cotton was 'miffed' that she couldn't smoke and claimed that 'Elf and Safety' forgot what old ladies 'need'; Del Boy was desperate for a Pina Colada; and a famous TV broadcaster and naturalist (who can not be named for legal reasons) was 'adamant' that he was never going near a piece of Bubble Wrap ever again. 

A well-known celebrity expert voiced his opinion on the matter, 'celebrities! You can never please them!'